Newgo Awards

After reading a couple of recent Livejournal threads (here and here), I find myself wondering: do we need some new Hugo Awards?

How about anti-Hugos, to abolish misgiven prizes? Could be named for Clifton & Riley. (The Clifley? The Rifton?)

Alternative Hugos from a parallel universe where something else won? (The Para-gos.)

Awards openly purchased to advertise someone’s backlist. (The Pay-gos.)

Awards given by oneself to one’s own best work in a given year. (The Yugos.)

Awards given to the best works of science fiction actually hacked out of wood by an axe. (The Hew-gos.)

About JE

James Enge is the author of the World-Fantasy-Award-nominated novel Blood of Ambrose (Pyr, April 2009). His latest book is The Wide World's End. His short fiction has appeared in Black Gate, Tales from the Magician's Skull, The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction and elsewhere.
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9 Responses to Newgo Awards

  1. zornhau says:

    And for sword and sorcery…

    The Mighty-Thew-Gos…

  2. shsilver says:

    Don’t forget the awards for books which are too large to be published in one volume and must be split in half…the Two-goes.

  3. davidcapeguy says:

    How about an annual “Seabury Quinn” award for the author who best drops a major nude/kink/sex scene irrelevently into a story, purely for purposes of cover art, or just to liven up a dull piece of exposition. (Robert Jordan or Terry Goodkind being major modern stylists of this type.)

    • JE says:

      Right–the sort of scene where the groans come from the writer’s desperation or the reader’s disbelief. The worst thing in this category that I ever read was a sexposition scene (is that a great neologism, or what?) from Trevanian’s The Eiger Sanction. There the cold-blooded hero is briefed by his improbably nubile contact even as he simultaneously debriefs her, if you know what I mean. When I was eleven or twelve I just read past the scene without paying much attention to it; when I reread the book last summer this part stopped me in my tracks. I couldn’t tell whether it was inept exploitation or self-parody or one masquerading as the other. Now there’s something worthy of a lifetime achievement award…

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